So I'm dating someone....I think.....

I'm pretty sure I have a boyfriend.....

I don't know his name......

age......

or really anything else about him.....

But I'm pretty sure we're dating......we just HAVE to be......it's a FOR CUTE story....
I'll tell you ALL about it.....

It all started when I was flying back from Seattle this past weekend....
I was feeling pretty jazzed about the fact that even though I was "B" boarding group (all you southwest flyers will feel me on that one) I was able to get an exit row seat. That means leg room galore.

Then I met him....well I guess we didn't really meet....but I can tell he wants to date me.

How, you ask???

Well it started like this....

First he was REALLY THOUGHTFUL and wanted to share the arm rest, but then I think wanted to sit even closer so he just put his arm completely over it so it hovered above my leg.....so precious.

THEN he leaned over to the left, past his seat and over into mine, so that way his shoulder was in front of mine and I had to lean back really far into my seat or lean all the way forward...but I know he was just trying to put on the moves.

THEN he had his leg go UNDERNEATH the arm rest so that way it was on my seat.....I know he was just trying to be close.

THEN he had his elbow WAY over into my seat while he was reading his magazine. He must have been trying to smell my sweet perfume because he kept his magazine really far to the side so every time he turned a page I had to lean back to miss his elbow....so romantic.

THEN when the lady handed us our thin crisp crackers he took mine, and then looked at me to see if I actually wanted it....turns out I did, so he gave it to me.....such a gentleman.

He was so smitten with me that he managed to be touching me the entire 1 hour and 40 minute plane ride. Can a girl get so lucky???


I REALLY knew it was love though, when he ATE MY COMPLIMENTARY PEANUTS when I was turned around......

See????

we MUST be dating!!!

We're even sharing FOOD!!!!!!!!

It's just SOOOOOOOOOOO magical.

True we never actually talked, and he is probably in his mid 40s, but I just know we're meant to be together....I KNOW it......

otherwise how could one explain such forward, romantic behavior????




...........



Now to reality.

I. almost. killed. him.

my thought processes were these:

'well, he is Indian by heritage...maybe in India they all stand really, REALLY close so he doesn't have any space boundaries??? Or maybe they have the type of culture that puts men really far above women so he's just acting normally and doesn't realize it's rude??'......

he talks to the flight attendant....definitely from America.

'well, well, well maybe there is something really wrong with his arm so her has to keep it really bent and sticking out all weird in people's faces?'

......then begins his yawning, stretching and brief arm folding phase.....yeah....the arm is fine

'hmmmmm....well MAYBE I'm on the VH1 show called boiling point where someone is set up by their friends and a REALLY annoying person does something for a certain amount of time and if you don't DESTROY them then you win $100 dollars!......'

..........

nope...no $100 dollars

'ok. that's it. I'll just fidget really bad so he's just shaking right along with me and maybe he'll go back to his space'....

....he held strong, EVEN when I was pumping my leg so hard I was practically sweating....

'dirty looks??'

....nope. Doesn't even phase him....

'stealing the arm rest when he leans forward?'

.....nope he just puts his on the empty space and gradually moves back until I' m forced to retreat again....


'rolling and flicking a booger on him?'

...yes I was getting desperate....no I didn't actually do it.....

'well maybe I'll just lean forward on my tray and try to take a nap'

....I put my head on my arms and I open my eyes and low and behold....there's my boyfriends hand. RIGHT. THERE. about 2 inches from my chest.....but that was probably my fault....I shouldn't have leaned forward if he's planning on being halfway in my seat.....


So BASICALLY I was going crazy. I don't know if I've ever been so annoyed with someone I've never actually talked too.....that's about it.

Also he took his SWEET time getting off the plane.....AWESOME.